the shape of absence
is always drawn through tears
on the tails of falling stars
and just like the pleiades
cannot be seen
if you stare directly
but only exists
in the corner of your eye
or someone else’s
just a habit whisper
phantom ghost
heard only at midnight
and in the after echo
of the twelve stroke
dissonant chime
the silhouette
of negative space
is deafening
.
.
.
.
February 19th, 2013 at 8:32 am
in the after echo
of the twelve stroke
dissonant chime
the silhouette
of negative space
is deafening
dang….nice close on this….and that it can not always be seen except out of the corner of the eye…great titling as well…and i like that it is a part of the poem…
February 19th, 2013 at 8:40 am
tepo challo
February 19th, 2013 at 9:38 am
I can see her :), that is beautiful
February 19th, 2013 at 10:41 am
“the silhouette of negative space is deafening.”
i wish i’d written that. i know the sound. i wish there was a way to keep anyone else from hearing it. but. life.
i like to think the absence is everywhere, slipping and sliding through open windows and raindrops, curled up next to me as i fall asleep. but perhaps first it must truly be loud and impossible to see.
beautifully written and truthfully told, and heartbreaking to the nth degree. but again. life.
xoxo
February 19th, 2013 at 12:19 pm
in the after echo
of the twelve stroke
dissonant chime
the silhouette
of negative space
is deafening…….
great lines, Kelly. As always beautiful.
February 19th, 2013 at 3:05 pm
I really like
“the silhouette
of negative space
is deafening”
which conjures up a lot of interesting thoughts!
February 19th, 2013 at 3:08 pm
and in the after echo
of the twelve stroke
dissonant chime
the silhouette
of negative space
is deafening…this is fantastic… love the title as well…so much food for thought in this
February 19th, 2013 at 3:09 pm
A lovely, quiet poem. Crisp as winter. I like the idea of absence being visible from the corner of someone else’s eye.
February 19th, 2013 at 3:34 pm
Wow! Yes, absence is far more evident than presence. A beautiful poem.
February 19th, 2013 at 3:50 pm
Such a well written poem. I love the last 2 stanzas. Very well done! 🙂
February 19th, 2013 at 3:51 pm
beautifully penned, mrs m… in fact, so beautiful it hurts to read (must have hit a rawness in me)
“the silhouette
of negative space
is deafening”
yes, i hear it…
February 19th, 2013 at 4:10 pm
Absolutely my favorite poem of this night…
February 19th, 2013 at 4:26 pm
‘and in the after echo
of the twelve stroke
dissonant chime
the silhouette
of negative space
is deafening..’
…pure poetry..i can feel it deeply.
February 19th, 2013 at 5:08 pm
Wow…those last couple of stanzas are especially breathtaking. Great writing Kelly as always!
February 19th, 2013 at 5:14 pm
So near, yet so far…
February 19th, 2013 at 5:37 pm
Heartbreaking, especially those last three lines.
February 19th, 2013 at 5:46 pm
So drawn to the voids in our lives, aren’t we? This – is so well done, Mrs. M
February 19th, 2013 at 6:27 pm
Great! Very tender and sparsely expressed. The work of a true poet… With respect Scott http://www.scotthastie.com
February 19th, 2013 at 7:17 pm
Your final lines are breath taking. Absolutely genius.
February 19th, 2013 at 8:17 pm
I specially love the last stanza ~ Beautifully penned ~
February 19th, 2013 at 8:57 pm
Very nice conveys a message in short and sweet way!
February 19th, 2013 at 10:07 pm
I was ready for this, you speak my mind and I wish I had written it. “The shape of Absence” just out of sight in other’s eyes in the night sky in that deafening sound . . . beautiful and true.
February 19th, 2013 at 11:19 pm
a fantastic but daunting title but i have to say that i think you deliver:
and in the after echo
of the twelve stroke
dissonant chime
its a big whole to fill
February 19th, 2013 at 11:38 pm
Oh how I’ve missed my daily dose of your beauty and wisdom. Your poetry creates breathing room, a true gift.
February 19th, 2013 at 11:44 pm
Wonderful words! Speaking the unspeakable, describing the indescribable. Nice…
February 20th, 2013 at 12:54 am
I like the description of absence hiding in the corners of eyes and yes I can hear it and see it at night. great poem
February 20th, 2013 at 4:40 am
the silhouette
of negative space
is deafening
— i like that ending a lot… maybe absence is quite easy to define but too difficult to understand… smiles…
February 20th, 2013 at 5:15 am
Make me sob, why don’t you. So fitting for how I have been feeling lately. Thank you for this.
February 20th, 2013 at 5:53 am
Like everyone else – the last two stanzas are breathtaking; lines I wish I had written.
A small point, but one that matters I think. You have used the title as the first line of the poem – and that’s fine – but the intervening image has left it completely isolated from the rest, which makes it harder to read.
February 20th, 2013 at 6:06 am
The last stanza surprised me…very well written. Negative space is not something that is commonly used in writing but in visual art, the darkness can be deafening. thank you
February 20th, 2013 at 7:35 am
the silhouette
of negative space
is deafening
Amazing!
February 20th, 2013 at 12:48 pm
Beautiful poem…especially the last stanza, for me.
February 20th, 2013 at 4:24 pm
Yes, it is. That ending is heavy like a too many blankets. So good.
February 21st, 2013 at 3:27 am
Metaphor and paradox work so well here. A beautifully balanced piece, poignant but unsentimental.