ah, forgiveness
{reverb11 – day 7}
::
Who have you forgiven this year and what was
the journey like that brought you to forgive them?
::
Forgiveness is such a tough one. For most of my life, I was really bad at it. I was one of those people, a grudge-holder. A thorn-in-my-side kind of person. It’s true.
In the last few years, I have shifted away from that. I think it started when I was ill, and the old cliche that life is too short started whispering itself in my ear. Tapping me on the shoulder. Tripping me when it thought I wasn’t looking.
But it’s true, you know. Life is too short.
And I have too many things I want to do to waste time holding grudges. To take up space in my heart and my soul with hatred and anger. To fill my days with looking back when all I need is right now.
More cliches, I know. Still, these are the realizations I came to. I’m not claiming to be good at forgiving just because I have reached this point. Forgiving is still a hard thing to do. Especially for the big hurts. But I am better at it now, because I’m willing to forgive. I don’t stand in the black or the white, I keep my feet in the grey. Well, at least I try.
So the answer to the question, who did I forgive this year?
Everyone. Including myself.
I let things roll off my back and on down the hill. I allowed myself to be less than perfect. I stopped clinging to the hope that I could do it all and chose the things I really wanted to do.
And I stopped holding grudges. Well, okay, I stopped holding them for such a long time, there may have been a moment or two that still managed to take hold of my senses. I’m only human, after all. But I forgave myself for that, too.
And my life is better because of it. The older I get, the more I learn to embrace humanity. Because we really are all in this together. There’s a whole fabulous spectrum between dark and light. I want to keep moving forward, and I am drawn to all that color, that green and that violet, that blue.
And besides, everything you’ve ever heard about forgiveness…
is true.
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December 7th, 2011 at 10:22 am
Thank you SO very much for writing yours first. 🙂
December 7th, 2011 at 10:25 am
Good on you for learning the lesson and letting forgiveness come more easily for you. I was reminded recently that when you hold anger against someone, they go on about their life business as usual and it is you who ends up paying for the negativity.
December 7th, 2011 at 10:31 am
Very true! I love this post and the pic that goes with it, it’s perfect. It’s also funny because I saw a quote on Twitter yesterday that said something to the effect of “Holding a grudge is like eating rat poison and hoping the rat will die.” I think it was from Pema Chödrön.
December 7th, 2011 at 10:32 am
There must be something in the air. I have been inclined not only to write about, but also to forgive. Such a release of energy.
Best luck with you on your journey.
December 7th, 2011 at 10:49 am
i just recently forgave my sister….lucky for her i have never held grudges, so she’s off the hook easily 🙂
December 7th, 2011 at 11:29 am
I’m not there, yet, but I’m working on it.
December 7th, 2011 at 2:47 pm
..the wounds are too raw. it is too soon. i have had too many ‘hurts’. i cannot forgive…yet.
i know i must..someday. forgiveness? one of the
most difficult tasks, of them, of myself.
December 7th, 2011 at 3:17 pm
Some things are easier to forgive than others, but I agree… there’s peace in forgiveness.
December 7th, 2011 at 3:55 pm
I try to forgive but I never forget and I have the hardest time forgiving myself. Think I need to work on that!
December 7th, 2011 at 6:42 pm
I may forgive but I never forget … and I can pretty much let things roll off me … gets easier the older I get!
December 7th, 2011 at 7:14 pm
makes me clap and jump for joy. I love grey, green, violet, and blue, and I love you!
December 7th, 2011 at 9:52 pm
i thought i commented here this morning. it rang so true. i thought i can’t write anything now, i will just say go to kelly’s place and provide the link. and tonight i sit here still thinking the same thing. xoxo
December 8th, 2011 at 8:58 am
Apologies, forgiveness, both signs of weakness according to John Wayne!
December 8th, 2011 at 9:06 am
I can forgive but I never forget … and that can be a problem
December 9th, 2011 at 10:43 pm
really love this…..never can hear it enough.
It doesn’t come natural at ALL.
But you’re right…life is too short.
Really struggling to forgive right now.
Stings.
Sure appreciate these life-giving words:)
love and thanks,
Jen
December 10th, 2011 at 11:29 am
I believe this is a lesson we – *I* – need to revisit periodically. Every now and then I need to be reminded what it feels to lift 100 pounds from my shoulders. And heart.
Beautifully expressed.