community. {reverb10 – day 7}
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Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010?
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I hang out by myself a lot. I work at home, so the great majority of my time is spent here, alone, with all these cats.
I am a loner, but I am almost never lonely.
Since I started my blogs earlier this year, I have made many new friends, my community has expanded exponentially. I have always been the kind of person that has just a few close friends, I am not so good in groups or wide social circles. I’m not someone who always has a lot of social engagements, I am quite content to stay at home.
But something in me is changing.
It’s not just that I am meeting so many new people, some of whom have become true friends, it is that I am learning to love humanity.
Does that sound weird?
Well, it probably does, but what I mean is that I have learned to embrace other people in ways that I never used to. I have learned how to forgive, how to accept, how to not hold back out of fear or shyness or insecurity.
I’m not always perfect at it, but this is a big change for me.
In high school, I was a geek, a nerd, I was very successful academically, I graduated eighth in my class. But socially, well, as my husband would say, I was a donut.
That was a long time ago, and I had learned to navigate my way through the world well before this year.
But I hadn’t yet learned to walk right up and give it a hug.
And that might just be the most important thing I learned all year.
Or in my life.
December 7th, 2010 at 11:24 am
Love this: “walk right up and give [the world] a hug.” Will give it a try today myself :).
December 7th, 2010 at 11:46 am
and i’m kinda’ the opposite, thelma juice. i was miss thing in high school, dating all the time, starting organizations right and left (mostly to give females opportunities), running the school office during the summers and at various times during every school day, and i graduated third in my class. but somewhere along the way, i pulled back, tucked in, became an introvert. i can point some fingers, that’s for sure, but it’s more of an evolutionary process i did all on my own. now, i’m not an extravert, i just play one on stage.
December 8th, 2010 at 9:14 am
“I’m not an extrovert, I just play one on stage” – boy does that resonate!!!
December 7th, 2010 at 12:08 pm
sometimes we are our own best company! i am so reminded of something my mom told me when i was younger and i think about it every day “you’re the only person you will see everyday of your life. make sure you’re happy when you see her.”
i don’t know why, but your post reminded me of that.. and when you’re ready you’ll stand up right and give a hug.. but maybe a hug to yourself is the first step.
xx
December 7th, 2010 at 12:26 pm
donuts are delicious!
December 7th, 2010 at 12:51 pm
this year, i learned how to be alone and ok with it. i was always envious of people who were alone and not lonely. finally joining the ranks myself!
December 7th, 2010 at 12:51 pm
Love you, too! So much. I’m so glad that we’re friends.
December 7th, 2010 at 1:06 pm
This is a fantastically succinct post. I feel this way sometimes too. I have NO idea why high school is considered such an important time… other than we worship youth in this country. 40 is pretty good to me and I am still learning.
December 7th, 2010 at 1:16 pm
No, I totally get that @ learning to love humanity more! I have been on that journey for awhile, but being connected in the cyberworld does take it up a number of notches~~lots of opportunity for love & understanding (esp. self-understanding!!)
December 7th, 2010 at 2:26 pm
I’m glad I have your blog to read to give me advice that I didn’t even know I needed. That’s how awesome you are.
December 7th, 2010 at 2:39 pm
learning to love humanity. that is a beautiful, delicious, warming goal. thank you mrs.
December 7th, 2010 at 3:47 pm
Love your post, it was what I was trying to get across in mine but you say it so more beautifully.
December 7th, 2010 at 3:56 pm
I am very much the same–often solitary, very quiet, small social circles, content to stay at home. And it doesn’t sound strange at all that you are learning to love humanity. It is beautiful, wondrous, something few are able to do.
December 7th, 2010 at 4:57 pm
I think lately the community I have seemed to get most attached to is online. Everyone in real life is so busy to take the time to interact.
I, too, am most comfortable in a one-on-one type of relationship. I have never enjoyed getting together with more than 2 other women at the same time. I more of listener than a talker and when there’s too many people I feel somewhat lost because all I end up doing is listening.
December 7th, 2010 at 5:19 pm
I totally feel you on learning to embrace people in a whole new way. I used to be so afraid of rejection and I think the more I learned to love myself the easier it became to interact with others. Love this!
December 7th, 2010 at 5:44 pm
Revel in the change, I say. I have made many new friendships in this online community, some I have even met in real life. I think it’s wonderful.
December 7th, 2010 at 5:45 pm
Came back to say that I love the simplicity of this photo. It’s lovely.
December 7th, 2010 at 7:20 pm
community indeed. i have a picture of a blue christmas ball that was to be my image for today’s reverb10 post. totally different, it being me and not you, but THAT’S how in tune we get here on line. love this & love the world giving you back a great big hug. xoxo
December 7th, 2010 at 7:45 pm
I’m having to re-learn how to give and receive those big hugs just because I’ve done a good job of retreating in recent years. It’s inspirational to see how others are embracing the communities that they’re beginning to become parts of. Great post!
December 7th, 2010 at 9:16 pm
is it strange that my online friends often hold a higher and a tighter spot in my heart then some real life friends…..
my sister thinks it’s odd….my mom kind of gets it.
i hope you know how much i have enjoyed embracing you….hugging you….this year !!!….we wouldn’t have met if blogging didn’t exist 🙂
December 7th, 2010 at 9:23 pm
For many years, I tried so hard to be a part of something to avoid being alone. And by alone, I meant by myself. That changed when I got to a point where I became comfortable in my own skin. I was still alone, but no longer so lonely. I was a more comfortable loner.
I married a woman who enjoys being at home more than anyplace else she could be. I like being with her. We are at home a lot. 🙂
December 7th, 2010 at 9:28 pm
“I am a loner, but I am almost never lonely.”
I see this in you only by how you take risks and do things other people only hope to do. While you’re giving life a bear hug, those around you embrace you all the time.
December 7th, 2010 at 9:39 pm
I hear you. I had boxed my life in so much. First step out was moving to an area that was more congenial to me. Second, I opened a twitter account and started reconnection. Its a good thing I did.
December 7th, 2010 at 10:40 pm
I love the way you put words to things. We have so much in common (or in “caramel” as my 4 year old friend said today). I’m so glad you are here giving the world and me hugs. Thank you!
December 8th, 2010 at 9:17 am
I can really relate to this post. This year, I’ve found that sometimes, in honoring my very real need for ‘alone time,’ I’ve forgotten just how great people can make me feel. And yet, if I have a particularly social week, I literally feel like an animal trapped in a cage until I get that unstructured time by myself that I crave. This month, I’ve started getting up earlier in the morning to have alone time first thing in the day – writing and reading. It’s amazing how much it fuels me. Thanks for sharing!
December 9th, 2010 at 2:47 pm
It’s interesting how many of the people responding to this prompt are loners – those with a few very good friends but no cohesive community. Yet, the underlying message is they all want to break out and find that community.
Perhaps it’s an artistic thing – creation tends to be a solitary endeavor. It’s a double edged sword in that you don’t need people in order to create while desperately needing them in order to create.
I’ve been reluctant, but like you, am learning to enjoy humanity.
Great post!
December 12th, 2010 at 3:40 am
Same here really – my online community has helped encourage, shape and grown my offline one. Both are good. One is made easier by the other. And thank goodness for it all!
December 27th, 2010 at 6:30 pm
I love your style about
community. {reverb10 – day 7} | that's mrs. mediocrity to you